To be completely honest, I am not even sure where to start with this post. So I guess I’ll just start off by saying why I follow Humans Of New York and why I think its the most beautiful form of ART I’ve ever seen. Humans of New York shows several inhabitants of the city and gives a short insight into the persons photographed life. And if you know me, you know I LOVE people and mainly strangers. I always have an interest of the person sitting next to me at the coffee shop, or the man standing next to me in the elevator, or the person I pass in the street. I’m fascinated by people and their LIFE stories. Think of how much wisdom could be spread in the world if we just took one minute to listen to someone we haven’t met. Everyone has faced their own struggles, it’s all apart of life’s beautiful journey.
Disclaimer: I am a Christian and the reason I am writing this blog is from an interest by my Christian friends asking as to why I would think this is beautiful. Truth be told…I’ve done my research. I have studied the Bible on this topic as well as secular views. I am full believer in examining BOTH sides and having a heart open to learning. I do believe marriage IS and CAN be a beautiful thing under God, but I also believe it can be a very ugly thing with wrong intentions. What is comes down to is a matter of the heart not a piece of paper to me.
With that being said, let’s dig into my admiration of this exact photo and story above. The photo shows a mans’ hand with a ring on his wedding hand and his statement “We thought it was an appropriate ring for two people who’d decided they never wanted to get married.” This statement alone is vague and that is something we must consider. We have no idea the intimacy of their relationship. BUT, what I do know is this:
- Love can exist without marriage, just as marriage can exist without love.
- The Bible is not black and white on marriage, if you look into every passage (not just ones that fit your agenda)
- Marrying too young is one of the top reason for divorce (It’s okay to take it slow)
- 45% say they divorce for lack of equality
I grew up in a home were I saw two people only stay together for us children. During that process, I saw both individuals loose their sense of SELF. I will argue till the end of my life that this is not healthy. (Note: I am not talking about healthy marriages here) But I also face reality that there are a lot of un-heatlhy marriages and relationships .
And in all honesty, does it matter if other people get it or not? They get it, the two people who are in that relationship and whose rings they are, and that’s surely all that matters. Metal worn as jewelry only has worth because we assign it worth, since it is not serving any real, useful function. It doesn’t matter if the metal on one’s hand comes from tiffany & co. or a second-hand store or an etsy shop, if it’s given out of love as a symbol of commitment, then it can be immensely valuable to the person.
Long story short, I refuse to be a Christian who doesn’t FULLY love others. It isn’t mine or your job to question couples love or commitment for one another. That is between them and the Lord. And truth be told I have seen more of those types of relationships succeed verse Christian ones.
“But let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love.” –Kahlil Gibran